The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Nice build in the drama. Good dialogue though you need to watch quotation marks and some punctuation around it. The first paragraph was a good lead in. Try spacing your paragraphs for better read. Thanks!:)
Ending seemed a bit abrupt, but sometimes 750 words can be limiting. Truth in the story in that not even a pastor's child is immune from evil. Adding white space between paragraphs would make it more readable. Overall, I like the message and find it well-written.
To make it more Reader Friendly, spaces between paragraphs would be helpful. However, a great story for the topic HELP; needs a little editing...but a very good job! Well done.
Another truly amazing piece of writing in the Beginner section! You do know how to write a gripping story, that's for sure---keep it up!