Home Read What's New Join
My Account Login

Read Our Devotional             2016 Opportunities to be Published             Detailed Navigation

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge



how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level


submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners

Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.



how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Start (01/16/06)

TITLE: An Impossible Beginning
By Kirralie Smith


Start – An Impossible Beginning

Who turned out the lights? Why is it so impossibly dark?


Nothing. No response, just complete and utter darkness. Darkness you could feel, as thick and cold as a blanket soaked in slime.

“Is anyone there? Hello!”

A hint of desperation began to creep over his mind. Where on earth was he? His mind began to grapple with the events leading up to this surreal moment.

It was the waves, that’s right. The biggest surf anyone had seen in years. There had been a meeting at work scheduled for that afternoon but he just couldn’t pass up this opportunity to grab his board and go for a surf.

The waves were incredible. Perfectly formed but huge. His adrenaline had never been given such a work out. One perfect ride after another. He sat on his board praising the god of the surf who had sent such perfect waves as the next set rolled in.

He paddled, caught it and was up. Just as suddenly he was down. His leg rope snapped and then there was that painfully terrifying crunch as the board slammed into his back. Everything went black.

He remembered tumbling, and just a few coherent moments of being smashed against the rocks. Hands were grabbing at him, calling out his name, “Ricko, you okay mate?” “Ricko can you hear me?” Then sirens, frantic voices calling instructions that he couldn’t understand. Being poked and prodded all over. What was going on?

A distant voice reassuring him he was in hospital, he was okay, they would look after him, just hang in there… Then peaceful sleep washed over him.

But why was it so dark. They didn’t normally turn out all the lights in hospital did they?


Where on earth was he?

“You’re not on earth sucker,” a menacing voice hissed at him through the darkness.

“What!” He cringed with fear.

“You scum bag. You deserve to be here,” a new and even more hideous voice screamed at him.

“Oh God, where am I?”

“Too late for God, buddy. You’re in hell. You had your chance but you gave it up. Welcome to your new home, time for a fresh start! Ha, Ha, Ha…” That mocking voice began to multiply. The torment was almost unbearable.

Hell? Did hell really exist? This must be some kind of practical joke. A drug he had never heard of that made everything go black and make you hallucinate. Maybe he had gone blind and his mates were playing a cruel joke on him.

His thirst began to increase and he became increasingly aware of painful sores covering his skin. And what was that foul and putrid stench? He began to gag and heave as the reality sank in. He had rejected God; thought religion was for weak, boring old folks. His capacity for understanding suddenly exploded threatening to overtake him. Jesus Christ was the son of God, the way to Heaven was through him alone, not waves, ecstasy, lust or anything else.

Oh God!

“Ha, ha, ha, ha…” the torment was increasing as was the thirst and pain.

Just let me die, I don’t want to suffer this, please not this!

A light began to appear, but rather than bring comfort his fear was magnified. The light was alive, the light was the King of Kings, the Eternal Judge.

“Ha, ha, ha, ha,” the menacing laughter increased, “this is just the beginning.”

The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.

This article has been read 577 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Jan Ackerson 01/24/06
A well-written cautionary tale! Twice you slipped into second person ("you")--try to avoid that. Otherwise, a very worthy story, with vivid word pictures.
terri tiffany01/26/06
Good story! Vivid word choice. Wish everyone would get the truths shared here. Thanks for writing about it.