The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/13/06
If you ever re-visit this piece, consider writing it as a story, with the "going to the store" incident, and the lesson you learned. It's an interesting incident, and would make a powerful story.

Watch out for run-on sentences.

Keep writing, you're doing well.
01/14/06
Everything is truly in God's hands. Good ideas here in this piece.