Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Bestie (05/22/14)
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TITLE: New Words??? New Meanings???? | Previous Challenge Entry
By Noel Mitaxa
05/29/14 -
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But rather than get all pedantic; and regret that our language is deteriorating into a kind of verbal vacuum cleaner that sucks up a mishmash of lexicographical loose ends and dumps it onto us; this entry intends to tap into the creativity behind these new words.
English is a living language; continually attracting new words and adding new meanings to existing words.
And now that newly-coined words have emerged as Challenge topics; I thought we could have some fun and add some new definitions to some familiar words ...
Archeologists: Historians with minimal self-discipline—for they like nothing better than to spend their lives in ruins.
Bullion: One thousand million New Zealand dollars.
Fransz Liszt: An obsesszive-compulszive Hungarian virtuoszo pianiszt and composzer who insiszted on keeping detailed cataloguesz of all hisz muszical maszterpieczes.
Homophone: A word that sounds like … a helpline for people with same-sex attraction.
Like: A word that’s, like, invaded adolescent speech patterns like a, like, punctuation mark; like, whether the rest of us like, like it or not, like.
Novas Kosher: A Canadian province where Jews need never fear how their food has been prepared.
Prima donna: A female entertainer whose insistence on having top-billing is nothing new, for this insistence arose many centuries pre-Madonna.
Silhouette artists: Illustrators who learn their skills the hard way, right from the start they have their work cut out for them.
Swordid detail: Forensic evidence that’s compiled by police investigating a fatal stabbing.
Won Shu: A Chinese amputee whose missing leg inspired him to write jazz lyrics; his most famous being “One Shoe come home, Bill Bailey.” This song has a very catchy tune - Won Shu get used to it.
Footnote. This entry may provoke some curiosity about the author's state of mind, but this is the Bestie could come up with….:-(
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It is the most original article I have ever read.
Great writing here, as usual!
Blessings, Lynn
There was much laughing and much groaning as I read this article, but no matter how much some of these puns hurt (I mean really, physically, hurt) I couldn't stop reading. Someday you must come to Austin and participate in Punfest (assuming they still do it).
Great job - especially if your goal was to make us roll our eyes and groan. :)
Hahahahahahahahahahaha!
Hahahahahahahahahahaha!
Completely beyond insane! Loved it and always am amazed at your brain and how it functions!!!
And my all time favorite of the group and my pick:
Novas Kosher: A Canadian province where Jews need never fear how their food has been prepared.
Hahahahahahaha!
God bless~
However, I feel quite at home with your malady. Like attracts like as the saying goes, so don't ever change will you.
Thanks for a good laugh. Much appreciated - whoever you are!!!
You will be held responszible for my fractured ribsz. My guffawsz roared through the housz like a housz a-fire.
You beat Bennett Cerf for humoranitariuminizm. (This is so fun to do to spell-checker!_
What will the world think of Australians by the time your word twisting is done. First we plait the poor pussy cat, then we call a man named Wal a bee -- and now we unleash your talent upon the world.
Brilliant blessings.
Verbal vacuum cleaner?!
Hilarious!