The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
05/22/14
Fun, creative and well done.

God bless~
05/25/14
A lovely story and a good lesson--my favorite format of Bible study.

I’m a beginner too, but somehow it’s easier to see the points of improvement in other people’s writings than in my own :-)

You could make your story flow better by applying more accurate punctuation and—sometimes--use less words; “tighten up your sentences” I saw someone describing it. I recently read a very helpful blog post at FaithWriters… if you want to check it out: http://faithwriters.com/blog/2014/05/23/words-on-display/

We’re here to grow!
Delightful. You won't be a beginner long. Your writing style is deliciously animated.
05/27/14
The narrative of this devotion is terrific, and the message is one of the most vital we will ever hear.

I love your ending: "Come out, come out, wherever you are!"

Surely that is God's call to all of us.

Great job!
05/29/14
Most the things I saw have already been commented on. I'll just tell you the good things I saw.

You have the makings of a great writer!

I enjoy the whole thing. and really got the message!

I loved the phrases you used - " the Hide and Seek" mentality.

..."then Satan handed me a golden platter full of lust, and for dessert, a nice bowl of "Stupid."

"We put away our childish toys and our childish games."

Most of all I love you ending "Come out, come out wherever you are."

I'm a beginner too, and it helps to see how others are growing as writers. Thanks for this!

God bless - Trudy
05/29/14
Congratulations!

God bless~
05/29/14
Ooh I missed this one earlier. Good Job! Congratulations!