The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/02/14
Great job with the topic. This piece offers the reader an enjoyable read with a good message.

Nicely done.
God bless~
05/04/14
Great story. I think it would be fun to take it a step further and have your protagonist decide digital-detoxing has been so illuminating as to cause her to start a personal campaign and see if she could get her friends to try detoxing for a whole week and then see what would happen...lot's of interesting story fodder here!
05/04/14
This was a fun story to read. I like how your mc expressed her opinions without going overboard with dishonoring her parents and such and that she did learn a valuable lesson in the end.
I liked the characters of your story. They came to life in such a short time. With just a few more descriptive phrases like- "with a nod of her head her long brown tousled hair fell onto her shoulder - we would have a picture of them.

The girl took her punishment/discipline well and ended up with a blessing in disguise.