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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Elephant in the Room (12/05/13)

TITLE: Freedom Frame
By Maura J. Merrigan
12/12/13


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The office runs long and narrowly bleak
The gatherers meet at the waterhole to speak
A mighty titan stands wedged at desks end
Yet barely can they squeeze past this eight by ten
Awkwardly nudgers move to the right
In the middle they waver as if heís out of sight
On the left they clumsily stumble with care
Do they not even see him posing there?

Weeks gone by and months fly away
You havenít moved an inch a single day
Crowds continue to press on through
They glance over and review what it is you do

We are seekers of peace and theyíre wondering why
I remove the grays and disguise the cry
I too, get regally dressed in the blues
Itís for freedom and privilege this life you choose

My soul awaits for the glorious season
When we all get a glimpse of the rhyme or the reason
And I pursue the promise that Iíll see you soon
My sweet, my courageous, my elephant in the room


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This article has been read 148 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Larry Whittington12/12/13
I especially liked the verses that had a steady rhythm. It takes a lot of work to get this as well as the rhyming.

I was a little lost at the meaning at the last verse but I am not always best with poetry.
Sheldon Bass 12/14/13
Some poetry has deeper meaning than what most readers can decipher, and I take that to be the case here.
I found your lines to be steeped in obscurity. I did enjoy this poem. Thank you for sharing. Keep on writing!
lynn gipson 12/16/13
This is a good aabb poem. The rhymes are excellent, the meter and flow is a little off, but it tells a good story. Try working on your syllable count a little more closely.

This is good, though, so keep writing. When I came in here, my poems were a lot like this. Blessings!
Judith Gayle Smith12/16/13
Lively, entertaining. . .

Please "throw a brick" for others to enjoy, comment and support your writing:

http://www.faithwriters.com/Boards/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=37705

Hebrews 10:26-31 KJV
Judith Gayle Smith12/19/13
Great poem! Congratulations on your well-deserved win!

Love & Hugs in, through and because of Jesus, the Christ,

Judi Hebrews 10:26-31 KJV
Happy Holydays, beware the holly daze . . .