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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Straight From the Horse’s Mouth (11/14/13)

TITLE: Could He Be The One?
By Dee Kyalo


I have lived through, or should I say survived, five failed marriages. Currently, I’m in this rocky live-in relationship that has earned me the title: “Husband snatcher.” I have become the talk of the town and lost my capacity to trust others or respect myself. That is why at this hot inconvenient time of the day, I come to the water refill station to get a refill of water. It’s my way of avoiding glares from all those women. Some do not even have any proof yet hold me on suspicion that I have slept with their husbands. I am not saying I haven’t but I am also not saying that I remember every man that I have been with.

Anyway, I see a man seated at the refill station. I can tell that he’s not from around here. He looks like one of them too good for us from the other side of the tracks; the kind who believes that if they associated with us from this part of town, it would make them ceremonially unclean. He suddenly looks up. Goodness gracious! He just caught me staring! Our eyes meet. I could swear I see love in them - or is it? He smiles. What a wonderful feeling especially now that most men around here want nothing to do with me. He smiled at me! Yes, he did. He could he be the one; my next husband. I break my stare and decide to just get my water, go back home and try to make my relationship work. If I talk to this stranger and my current man finds out, he’d probably leave. Oh no, I can’t be alone. How I wish the man in my house could just marry me but his story is that his wife won’t leave him and he doesn’t believe in divorce.

I position my 5 gallon water container for a refill. “Will you give me a drink?” The stranger asks. Did I hear right? Was he talking to me? My heart is racing. Is this a genuine request or a cheesy pick up line? I wasn't sure. Nevertheless, I compose myself and ask him, “You’re from the right side of the tracks and I’m from the left, how can you ask me for a drink?”

Fast forward, although we had never met before, this man spoke so gently, yet with authority revealing my tainted past to me. If he didn’t have my full attention before, he now did! Then he said, “Indeed, the time is coming.” Now, my heart is racing but for a different reason than before. It is palpitating with anticipation of good things to come because this is what I hear: “Things are about to change.”

The second reason my heart is pounding, is the reality of what is just about to happen because he also said, “And it is now here.” Surely, the waiting is over! My anticipation has just turned into reality. He also said, “Those who drink the water that I will give them will never be thirsty again.” Boy, I seize my moment! I always felt that there’s got to be more to life than what I have experienced so far. I’m hopping onto this wagon! Turning off the water dispenser, I said: “Sir, give me that water!”

Notice that when this man mentioned my questionable past, he wasn’t a Pharisee pointing an accusing finger. No, I learned that He was the Good Shepherd walking for miles to find one lost sheep - me; the Great Physician pouring healing love into my deepest wounds - my soul; and the Way that leads out of misery and into the life I always longed for.

I am here to tell you that if you reach by faith and receive what He has for you, things will never be the same again. Your story will change. God’s grace turns the failures of our past into fertilizer. Like a lily springing up in a mud marsh, God offers us: “Beauty for ashes, and the garment of praise in exchange for the spirit of heaviness.” It is no longer where you’ve been and what you have done that matters but where He has been (on that cross) and what He has done for you (taken up your sins and punished for them by death). Take it straight from the horse’s mouth.

Inspired by John 4:1-42, Isaiah 61:3

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This article has been read 125 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Larry Whittington11/21/13
A nice use of the story to tell us that we all need Jesus.

Good work on it.You had to put some thought into it.

When we first learn that Jesus is both Lord and Christ, we should want to repent, (look forward to a new life as your character did) and be baptized to clean us from our sin. We than can walk in this new life.

I liked your style. Keep writing.
CD Swanson 11/23/13
Great job with the retelling of the Samaritan woman at the well. Great approach to the topic at hand.

Really liked it!

God bless~
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 11/23/13
This is a delightful retelling of the familiar Bible story. I liked how you put a modern spin on it.

Remember to start a new paragraph when someone new speaks (or has an action). Also write out numbers under ten (some say under a hundred).

You did a wonderful job of pulling me into the mind of the MC. It is nice to see articles like this that make the reader think in a different POV. Nice take on the topic too.
CD Swanson 11/29/13
Congrats! God bless~
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 11/29/13
Congratulations on ranking 1st in your level and 11 overall! (the highest rankings can be found on the message boards).