Who is that pretty face in the mirror? Oh yeah, mine. I'm so beautiful! How do all the ugly girls go on living? Would these blue, sparkly earrings look better or would these long, pink ones make me look better? I'll look great either way! I always do.
"Sweetie, you'll be late for the bus if you don't come out of the bathroom soon. I have your lunch on the counter."
"No carbs, right?"
"No carbs, I promise. I've gotta leave for work now. Love ya, honey. Bye."
"See ya, Mom. I'll be down soon." I don't take the stupid bus anyway; my boyfriend drives me to school. There are way too many ugly people on that ugly bus. Do I use the word ugly too much? I'll just talk more about how beautiful I am. That's more positive.
Beep. Beeeeeep. "Miss Drama Queen, I'm ready to go."
Does he have to shout through the house that way?
"Chad, I'm coming. I gotta finish my makeup in the bathroom." He's the second hottest person on the planet. Of course, me being the first. We're such a perfect fit.
Ah, there's my lunch. I better hurry or I'll be too late to laugh at my neighbors who take that stupid bus.
"Why are you always in the bathroom or in front of a mirror? You're so vain!"
"Good morning to you, too, Chad." I am not vain! "Do you think I look alright today? Do I look better than…stop looking at that Jeep and answer me, Chad! Do I look sexy?"
"Yeah, sure Baby. You always look great."
"Are you just saying what you think I want to hear? It doesn't matter anyway; I still think you're cute!"
"Hold on, I'm going to drive a little faster to make up for the time you spent in the bathroom."
2 hours later.
"You're awake, Honey! Thank God you're alive!"
Is that Mom? What's she doing at school? Wait, I'm not at school. "Where am I?"
"You were in a car accident. Chad made it out with only a few scratches. But you…"
"Forget Chad, am I still beautiful? Tell me, was my gorgeous face damaged in the accident?"
"Sweetie, you must remember beauty isn't only outward…"
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