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But Mama I am beautiful my heart cried out in anguish! I am so sorry that my hair does not make big ringlets like my Sissy’s, and I know somehow my clothes always get messed up and I don’t know why I am so fat! If my Daddy were alive he would call me “Stinky” but that is a pet name and it makes me smile. I think my Daddy thought I was beautiful!
And my heart whispered… There is an unconditional love!
But I am beautiful my heart cried out in anguish! I just want to be your little friend. I think your brown skin is beautiful! Why do you call me white trash and make fun of my clothes? Why do you call me fat-so and not play with me at recess? I would pick you to play with me, it doesn’t matter how you look.
And my heart whispered… There is an unconditional love!
But my husband I am beautiful my heart cried out in anguish! You blame me because you drink, you say if I would be a better wife, or if I wasn’t so fat, or if I did more for you, things would be better. But I work so hard to make things better, I try hard to love you in spite of the way you treat me and I tell no one when you yell at me and hit me. Why can’t you see that I try my best to love you?
And my heart whispered… There is an unconditional love!
But my babies, my children, I am beautiful my heart cried out in anguish! I touch your downy baby cheeks, and my heart squeezes with love for you as I hold your little bodies close to mine. When I look into your little faces my smile reflects back at me, and I want so much to protect you at all costs. Oh, my babies, my children you make me feel that I am beautiful!
And my heart whispered…you are beginning to understand that unconditional love!
But GOD I am beautiful my heart cried out in anguish! I am here at your altar. My life has been such a wreck. I did the best I could but I never seemed to measure up. I still loved my Mama when she chastised me. I suffered when my Daddy died. I tried always to be friends to everyone in spite of the way they treated me. I stayed with my husband as long as I could while he abused me. And oh GOD, I have loved my children beyond measure, I would die for them.
And GOD whispered into my heart. My daughter… You finally understand that unconditional love. You have suffered plenty, but not even a tenth of what I suffered so that you might feel loved and beautiful. I suffered persecution, abuse and prejudice. I chose to give up my life on the cross so that I might show you that unconditional love.
You are beautiful my daughter! I see that smile upon your face as you are looking up to me, and my image is reflected in the beauty of that smile. I look into your heart and I see no malice to those who have abused you, I feel nothing but love pouring from your heart and that is how I meant you to be, a creature in my own image.
And my heart whispered. At last… you have found that unconditional love!
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