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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Beautiful (11/07/05)

TITLE: Beauty from Within
By Renee Hanlon
11/08/05


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I look in the mirror and what do I see?
Age spots and wrinkles and the start of gray hair
I struggle to fix these at quite a great fee
It would be so easy if I did not care

I want to be beautiful, so I go forth
Day after day with this improvement and that
I’m increasing the value of my self worth
I will do what it takes not to get fat

I devote so much time, mainly for others
How will they all see me? Or is that just pride?
I’m sorry dear Christian sisters and brothers
I’ve spent too much time on what is on the outside.

God forgive me for using my precious time
Mostly for appearance but not what you see
I can be beautiful and not spend a dime
By looking to you and not always at me

I know true beauty really comes from within
Please help me to put my focus back on you
Reflecting your image and not my own sin
So others can see you through all that I do


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This article has been read 428 times
Member Comments
Member Date
dub W11/14/05
Good attempt, becareful forcing rhymes, if it is a struggle to find the matching rhyme consider the primary verse, perhaps it can/should be rewritten. Thanks for posting.
Garnet Miller 11/14/05
It's okay-physical beauty is fine, but that is not who we truly are. Some of the most beautiful people have ugly hearts. God works from the inside out. That is where we need to concentrate. Thanks for the well written poem:)
Katherine Douglas11/15/05
good message
Denise Stanford11/15/05
'Please help me to put my focus back on you
Reflecting your image and not my own sin'

To ponder this alone, is poetry - Deni
Jeffrey Snell11/15/05
Well written, nice job of bringing it back around at the end. Keep writing!


   
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