The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 653 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
11/07/05
Very cute!! I really like this. A few sentences could have been broken into two but overall, I though it was well written! I really felt for him!
11/07/05
Very good. You left out a couple of words, and some sentences could have been written differently. Your overall story is nice though, keep working on the simple things like grammar, and re-read your work a few times, and you'll be there in no time. Good Job
11/08/05
Yours is a very creative "take" on the "I can't sing" theme. Good job!
11/10/05
OK. I'm jealous. This is really smart. The character's style changes too much though at the end. Not in being thankful, but it seems a bit forced, not natural. But I really like the full body of words painting a picture here...
11/11/05
I agree with all the rest. What a great premise. I like the humor. I also agree that the last paragraph does not seem to fit with the rest(just a tiny word of critique in an otherwise great piece). All in all, very sweet and fun to read.
11/12/05
I can't add more to the comments above, but I will say, I expect the police to be waiting for me every Sunday, for just the same reasons. blessings - dub
Fun story. Good work.