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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Flat (01/03/13)

TITLE: Her Flat Mood
By
01/07/13


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It was a cold winter morning
When she awoke from disturbed sleep
Sweat covered her body
Her emotions were weak

She gathered her clothes
Then brushed her teeth
Her mood was flat
Her joy underneath

A mountain of trials
She faced every day
Which one was it
That would have its say

She was not up or down
Just existing each hour
She needed something more
Than her own power

She took a deep breath
To see if her mood would inflate
After a long while
She felt it was too late

She got on her knees
As her last resort
Her problems needed met
By a higher power of sort

She remembered a friend
Who shared with her God’s Son
Would He help her out
Would He be the one?

She prayed for Him
To enter her heart
To lift her flat mood
Turn around a new start

As she prayed and cried
Jesus touched her shoulder
He said “Dear one”
I am your molder

I will fix your life
Uplift your emotions
Fill you with joy
Calm all your commotions

Just trust in me
Give me your heart and mind
Your flattened mood
Will soon be behind

For with me none is too hard
I am your Savior
I died for your sin
bled for your behavior

So just let it go
Give your moods to Me
My love heals all
That you shall see


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This article has been read 169 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Jody Day 01/10/13
Nice job. Your poem has a definite beginning, middle and end. You pull the reader along to a satisfying conclusion. Good treatment of the topic. Some of the rhythm is awkward, but overall a wonderful job. Keep writing!
Phee Paradise 01/11/13
I'm not huge fan of poetry, but I liked this one. I agree that the rhythms were a bit awkward, but the message was well communicated and I really like the line "her joy underneath."
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 01/13/13
This is beautiful. It reminds me of the poems I often write that may start out a tad dark but then God brings in the light. Your words just flowed off the page and your rhymes were a delight. I totally enjoyed this delightful poem.
Camille (C D) Swanson 01/14/13
The prolific ending says it all! Great job. God bless~
Bonnie Bowden 01/14/13
I really thought this poem expressed depth of feeling. Although the rhyme was off slightly in spots, I really liked it.
Theresa Santy 01/15/13
Deep, moving, and profound. Well done.