The Official Writing Challenge
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01/10/13
Add a scripture and you have a beautiful devotional. Do add space between paragraphs for easier reading. I would cut the part about your having been sick and going to the bank, and start with going out to take the photos. Great job! Keep writing!
01/10/13
Excellent message. I agree with Jody about starting your story with the picture taking and about spacing.
01/10/13
Good devotional thoughts. You've given us some things to think about.
01/11/13
Nicely written. Thank you for sharing this with us!
Great metaphor. The places that appear safe and inviting are often the dangerous ones. I like the thought of someone taking a risk to leave behind a warning.

To sharpen this devotion, I would cut most of the first paragraph and get us right to your theme.

Good job with your analogy and bringing it all together!
This is a delightful devotion. It is the perfect length for most devotion meetings. I like how you showed a real life example that many people can relate to.

In the middle, you switch gears somewhat by asking questions. This is just my personal opinion but the questions felt a bit relative. Instead just by switching it up some you can change the tone. For example: As I reflected on my life, my stomach churned ad I remembered the times when I ignored the earning signs left by God. I began to tremble as I ruminated on the times when God protected me from multiple dangers.
That example might not be exactly what you were looking for but I hope it helps show you the difference between asking a string of questions and showing the MC in a bunch of scenarios.

There are many great things about your piece. You have some excellent examples of painting a picture for the reader. I could picture your beautiful descriptions in my head. Your message was powerful and one we all need to reflect on from time to time. The ending puffed with passion (that's a really big compliment) It also brought the piece full circle. Thank you for sharing this with me. I have been blessed by your words.
01/14/13
Vivid details along with a beautiful message unfolded in this touching entry. Wonderful work! God bless~
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