The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 368 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
11/22/12
Interesting.
11/23/12
As Christina commented, this is an interesting entry. You say some wonderful things and list pertinent scripture, but I had a hard time following. I couldn't decide if this was an actual sermon or if you were telling a story. Although it definitely could use some editing, it was a nice effort and I could see how you were trying to incorporate the topic into your entry.
Keep writing!
11/23/12
You expressed some very good thoughts in this article. I really liked your comment on being mindful that many come to church hurting and are in need of healing and encouragement from the community of believers.
I found parts of the article difficult to follow. For example, I wasn't sure if you meant a certain significance by the final sentence being posed as a question: "May God bless you?".
I did appreciate the obvious care and work you put into this piece and the reminder of the importance of time spent in prayer and Bible reading.
I look forward to reading more of your work. :)
You make some great points in this sermon. It is true that we should be trained before we go out into the world. Of course the best way to get this training is to read the Bible and commune with God on a regular basis.

I did have a hard time following this. There were random quotation marks that made me wonder if the pastor was still preaching. You need to break the dialog up some with action. For example: The minister pointed his finger right at the people wiggling about in the first pew. That sets up not only who is talking but it gives insight into the personality of your MC.

I think the Bible verses you selected were a perfect fit to your topic. I think the military spin on the topic is an interesting and unique metaphor. It reminds me of the old hymn, Onward Christian Soldiers. You definitely have a passion in your words and I can tell you want to share God's love with as many people as possible. Keep writing, it's a great way to get the message God lays on your heart to the world.
11/27/12
I felt your heart for God in this piece. Nicely done, and a wonderful job as well. Thank you.

God bless~