The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
10/11/12
Ooooh...the friends were "harsh!"

This was a good story, well written, but made me sad that jealousy, the overriding factor in this scenario, allowed the friend to "eat crab puffs." She could have really gotten ill!! Allergic responses can be deadly. Not a very nice friend. Brrrrr! LOL

However, overall it was an interesting read and a clever story.

God bless~
10/12/12
CD,
As a nurse, I do realize the seriousness of allergic reactions. I debated the issue in my mind as I was writing this piece, but decided that this was a fictional story and just went with it. (Remember, I did point out that Emma knew Beth would be fine.)

"Jealousy" . . . I was thinking more along the lines of sweet revenge, for the way Beth had treated everyone in the sorority over the years. More importantly, I want the reader to see that a prideful heart can lead to your ultimate downfall.

I look forward to your insights each week, they really mean a lot to me. Thanks for you support and may God bless you!!
10/12/12
I enjoyed this story but I agree with CD that the friends were harsh. But good job.

God bless you.
I'm not quite sure which emotion is fluttering around my head. I think we all know someone like Beth. The media pounces on celebrities and the public eats up any news of their mistakes. It makes me wonder why people like to see others "get what's coming to them". You did a great job of showing and I could easily picture the scene unfold. I felt such a sense of sadness when the whole room snickered at the bride-to be's debacle. Maybe because my daughter is getting married in 2 weeks, I could totally empathize with Beth. Your piece will definitely make the reader think, as well as examine their own actions and attitudes, and that's a great thing to do--make people think. Well done.
10/14/12
Friends like this we don't need, but I remember ones from my younger years like her. Well written and shown. Keep Writing!
10/15/12
Thanks to all of you for your critiques!
I agree, the friends were harsh, but this was just a fiction piece. I pray that none of you bleieve that I could actually be like this! LOL
When I write, I try to let the story go where it wants. And considering I had just watched the movie "Mean Girls" with my daughter,the vendictive characters just sort of happened. With only 750 words, it was hard to really take it where I wanted it to go (a lesson learned for both parties), but please remember . . . it's only a story.
Again, thanks so much for the reviews. Your words and advice always mean so much and have helped me grow as a writer.
God bless each of you!!
10/15/12
LOL! That should be "believe".
10/17/12
Thanks for sharing your story. Keep writing.