The Official Writing Challenge
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This is a cute story. I really like the clever, catchy names of your characters. You captured my attention right away.

I noticed a few tiny errors like Psychiatrist, Reception Desk shouldn't be capitalized. Also when quoting a person inside a quote you should use the single quotation mark like this--"...you know what her thoughts are, 'I won’t take long,' that is what she always says.” or an em dash (--) would work in this case too.

I think you have a delightful sense of humor and I found myself giggling quite often. I also wondered how long it would take for someone to come up with a Itsme Mall. I also though the "bright side" comment: “Well, today is ruined, but maybe we will have control of tomorrow.” is absolutely hysterical. Nice job.
09/07/12
This entry left a big old fat smile on my face. What a delightful read. You have a very vivid imagination as shown in your characters' names and I absolutely love the name of the Itsme Mall. Sounds like a good one to have. There was one place in particular where you used quote marks not only in the beginning and end of a sentence, but in the middle as well. I'm sure you know that isn't necessary. I found your entry to be a absolute delight.
09/07/12
I love it! "Junk food is skunk food and I won't wear it." Positively hilarious.
09/12/12
Cute story!

A little work with run-on sentences and puncuation and it could be even better.

Good luck with your writing!!