The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 672 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
11/01/05
A clever take on the old Bible story of Sarah and Hagar. You embellished it nicely with your choice of fragrances. I also like your ingredients at the end for having the right fragrance.
11/01/05
Lose some of the affirmations, and this interesting prestation will read much better.
11/02/05
Are the capitalized words names of perfumes? If so, very clever.
11/03/05
HEHEHE--I noticed the OBSESSION, and I really enjoyed reading this. It took me by surprise, and interested in what fragrance you would come up with next. This is pretty unique, which intriqued me. God bless ya, littlelight
11/03/05
This is really clever! When I finally caught on, had to take a pause, laughing so hard. Love the way you pulled it together at the end!
Not up on fragrances, I can only asume that the use of upper case signified a perfume name. If so, very well done. Personally I thought the story was quite powerful without the personal application at the end - Envy Me, Obsession, Temptation - the fragrances all told the tale and drove the point home. Keep writing.