The Official Writing Challenge
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This is a riveting story. It tugged at my heartstrings for sure. You did a wonderful job of getting inside the MCs head.

You could make the story even stronger by using narrative descriptions instead of taglines like she said. For example something like this. "How's it going?" Nadine's brow furrowed as she lowered her voice. Her eyes didn't quite connect with her friend's. Hopefully something like that will give some insight onto the character's emotions. It's easier to say Nadine worried about her friend but describing her actions helps the reader paint a picture.

You really did a wonderful job on this story. It makes me sad for all those who suffer on silence. It prompted me to pray for them ad well. You covered the topic while conveying an important message. You also did it without sounding preachy or judgmental which isn't always easy to do.
08/16/12
This was a gripping story that held significant meaning in each and every word written. It's a story that anyone can relate to...we've all known or know someone like the MC.

You've managed to convey her inner anguish in a savvy way that shows the reader what she is going through. The turmoil and the disappointment apparent as evidenced by her "resolve" that it's the "same old thing."

The ending was powerful and showed the MC rejoicing without being overly solicitous to the reader.

Nicely done. Great job.

God bless~
08/16/12
Great job! You introduced a conflict and gave your MC a personality early on, and yu kept me reading to find out what happened next. I love the twist at the end, tho I hate that it does nothing to put a "happy ending" on her home life. But reality isn't always rosy, and I appreciate that you didn't give your story a fairy tale ending.
08/18/12
You took a grim reality and gave it a bright finish. Good job.
08/19/12
Well done. This is a great story about a situation that is all too commmon.
08/20/12
I knew we had something in common only I was much younger....This is excellent writing and I can relate to pulling the covers over your ears dear.....Thank you for this.

God BLess, Lynn
08/20/12
Oh boy, do I ever love it when an author tells me a story with such intimacy that I would swear out an affidavit that I was on scene myself – and, this gripper did it ! And then, to twist it ! All right, I can only conclude with one further comment, no, one plea – please, keep on writing !
You did an excellent job of making your characters real while presenting a difficult situation and providing a realistic solution.
08/23/12
Congratulations! God BLess~