Home Read What's New Join
My Account Login

Read Our Devotional             2016 Opportunities to be Published             Detailed Navigation

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge



how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level


submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners

Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.



how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Banquet - deadline 8-16-12 10 am NY time (08/09/12)

TITLE: Biggest Loser XXIII
By Tiara Huffman


I sat looking around at my teammates. All of their faces colored with the same expressions I felt, nervous, excited, worried and even embarrassed. It was the final weigh-in and banquet for the Biggest Loser XXIII. I look over at Justin our trainer and see him motion for everyone to join him. It is now Team Rabbit’s turn to weigh.

60 days ago I, my teammates and many others started the biggest loser competition at Vision Quest gym. We all set our own goals, and worked hard to get to this point. Did we reach the goals we had set out for ourselves? Or had we missed the mark? Had all the group sessions, personal sessions, and our own time at the gym paid off? 50 pounds. 50 pounds, that was my goal at last weigh-in I was at 44. 6 more was all I needed the scale to tell me today. That I had did it. I had made my goal of 50 pounds.

Suddenly all the nerves and fears got to be too much and I felt like I was going to puke. I wanted to blame it on all those supplements they have me on. But I know it isn’t true, it’s the nerves, and those supplements they push so hard on aren’t to blame for my stomach doing flips, they are to thank that I am now able to do flips, and run 5 miles. I thought I was going to die after that first class, all those burpees Justin, made us do. I still hate them, don’t get me wrong. But they got me where I am today. I look over at Terry my sister. She did the biggest loser last time and was already down 25 pounds at the beginning of this one, and she had dropped another 20 since the start. Since she had been through this before I had leaned on her to get me through. She gave me a look that said, “What the heck is your problem? Quite looking at me!”

Terry was next, Justin waited for the digital numbers to stop moving.
“Down 4 pounds, total weight lost 24 pounds!” My family in the audience cheered while I stood screaming on stage. It was now my turn, I was so scared I could have fainted. Justin looked at me.

“It’s okay, relax you’ve done well, I am proud of you. Don’t worry you did good.” He said rubbing my shoulder as I got on the scale. Anytime I was ready to give up, he was there to push, thank God for that. And I did, I called out to him more than once in many of my sessions. I also cursed and then turned right around and repented. This journey wasn’t just one of a physical level it was also an emotional and spiritual journey. As I grew thinner, I grew in God and I began facing some of my emotional baggage that I had been carrying around and letting dictate my life.

“TJ down 8 pounds.” I started crying right there. I couldn’t believe that I had not only made my goal but had surpassed it. I was so overwhelmed that I almost couldn’t take in my family’s cheers, or my trainer announcing my total weight lost or the gym owner calling me over to share. I was lead over to the owner as he asked me to share and thrust the microphone into my face before I could stop crying.

“So, what was it that got you here?” I took a moment to stop the tears before answering.
“I was asked when I first joined, what was my weight loss plan. At the time I said I didn’t have one, because I simply didn’t know what to do. And that’s true. But my plan was to do what they tell me to do with as little complaints as possible. And though I may have failed on the ‘little complaints as possible’ part I did what they told me, I stuck to the diets, took the supplements, and showed up at workouts and weigh-ins.” There were cheers that followed, the remaining biggest losers weighed in and some got asked to share, then the banquet followed. Subway sandwiches and water was served with all the dotFit supplements made available at half off awhile everyone ate, mingled and congratulating everyone at their accomplishments. It was like an out-of-body experience. I never thought I would be here.

Note: TJ is Female.

The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.

This article has been read 356 times
Member Comments
Member Date
C D Swanson 08/16/12
Nice job of with the topic, and congratulations to all (if this is a true story)

Well written and very touching. Nice accomplishment. God Bless~
Catrina Bradley 08/16/12
Oh, I was SO cheering by the end, hoping the MC (you?) made her goal. Thanks for the smile - your testimony brought me joy.
Nancy Bucca08/16/12
Nice take on the topic, though it might (in my opinion) better fit the Diet theme. Nevertheless, it's a good read as well as an encouraging story.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 08/17/12
This is an exciting story. I found myself rooting for the MC. I even crossed my fingers.

Some tiny red ink--in the beginning you started with past tense, then switched to present. Also you should write out numbers less than ten and really less than one hundred. Also don't ever start a sentence with a number.

I enjoyed your characters. They felt quite real. Losing weight is not easy to do. I smiled at the irony of having a big banquet to celebrate the end of a diet. You did a nice job from beginning to end.
Laura Manley08/18/12
What an exciting accomplishment and inspiring story. I too go to Vision Quest and have for over a year. I haven't joined the Biggest Loser, but have friends that did and have done remarkably well. I noticed in your very first paragraph that you were changed tenses. This was truly a most enjoyable story of accomplishment not only in the weight loss area, but emotionally and spiritually. Nicely done.
Ellen Carr 08/19/12
Well done. You expressed well the emotional aspects of efforts to lose weight. A suggestion: check tenses to keep them consistent throughout and spelling (led not lead).