The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
11/01/05
I agree. I thought your telling of the story and of Mary's emotions was well done!
11/01/05
I have read this story told in many ways, but you have added the drama and realism to the narration. Thank you.
11/01/05
This is one of my favorites this week. You drew me right in. Great job.
Wonderful!
11/02/05
Thanks for this unique peek into the thoughts of this familiar Bible character. Well-written.
11/03/05
you write beautifully!
11/03/05
When I did not know Christ, I wondered as Mary did, if He even had time for me. Why should he care? Thank God that He does care about even the hairs on my head. Beautifully done:)
11/03/05
I think I could relate to the nervousness approaching Jesus, someone I thought to be a mighty man of God..and me a sinner. I liked your take on the story- and thinking that in the prescense of the Holy One I know I would break down and cry too. Very realistic emotions described.
God bless ya, littlelight
11/03/05
Thanks for giving us a glance into your perception of Mary. Great emotion and tension. Good job!
11/03/05
I really like your style! I do agree that it would be better to lend a bit of mystery to whom this woman is, unnamed at the beginning. The last paragraph has too many Mary's in it. I think it might have more 'punch' if only one were used there, when she realizes that her name holds a new identity. That God's relationship is intimate personal.
11/03/05
Very well done :) I enjoyed reading your version.
11/04/05
Beautifully written. You have presented Mary's emotions very vividly and drawn the reader along with your story telling.
Very good work. I love the emotions you attribute to Mary as she approached Jesus. I would have felt like that.
11/06/05
Yes, you really connected to Mary and portrayed her probable thought and emotions very convincingly. yeggy
11/06/05
You are good at writing thoughts and feelings. Take this up one level and make the story come even more alive by adding in the senses-smells, textures, sounds, movements; let us be Mary.