The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/01/05
Good strong message with a timely metaphor. Work on finding truer rhymes, and more consistency of rhythm and meter. Thanks for this unique look at "fragrance."
11/01/05
Jan pretty well summed up the mechancial things here. I think there is an opportunity within these verses to make some strong statements. Work on it, you have something to offer.
11/03/05
I agree with the above..very moving also.
God bless ya, littlelight