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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Fragrance (10/24/05)

TITLE: The Fragrance of the Lord
By Yolanda Baker


Samantha sat up after a long nights sleep. As she yawns and rubs her eyes, she pinches the skin on her arm to be sure she is fully awake. Today is special; she is going to be her with her mother, Amy, who works in JC Penny’s behind the perfume counter. One day her mother prays she will have her own perfume store and call it “Fragrance” as she believes this name should be used for all customers rather than perfume, then everyone buying “fragrance” will know they are unique and special.

Samantha’s heart started to race as she thought of all the different bottles she would be able to sample. She raced out of bed and threw on her tee shirt, a pair of socks, her favorite pair of faded blue jeans and her tennis shoes. She liked how today was the first day of summer holiday and no more school until September.

“Hi Mom, what’s for breakfast”? She asks as she skips into the kitchen.
“Good morning sweetheart, how did you sleep last night”?

Her mother loved cooking breakfast for her family. Today she whipped up some French Toast with melted butter and freshly simmered maple syrup. Amy knew this topping is Samantha’s favorite, especially warm syrup. Amy had everything ready before he daughter came down to eat.

“Yes I slept well even though I’m so excited about being with you today.”

The car seemed to move slower than a snail’s pace, Samantha snapped her fingers to relieve the tension inside. When the car finally stopped, Samantha couldn’t wait, her nose twitched while contemplating the entire array of aromas in the bottles at JC Penny’s.

She waited patiently at the mall door as her mother fumbled with the keys. Then her mom had to punch numbers into the security system to stop the alarm. “When will I be able to smell all those amazing fragrances?” she thought to herself. The lights went on and there it was, The counter held so many different bottles of all-different shape and sizes as well! Samantha’s eyes lit up as she saw many different colors of perfume. “ Samantha, be gentle and remember you only have thirty minutes until the shop opens and the customers come in. Then sweetheart you will need to sit out back and read your bible until lunch time”. Her mother knew that Samantha needed hours to sample everything here. Her daughter will have to come back another day over the summer and spend more time sampling all she didn’t get to today.

“Oh, ok mom, I promise I’ll be gentle. She stepped up to the counter and chose the bottle that was shaped like an hourglass. Yet, when she opened the bottle the smell tickled her nose. She wondered how a “fragrance” could do that and looked at the name of the scent, midnight dreams “ I’m not sure I could use something that tickles my nose” she thought out loud. The minutes ticked by fast as she opened each bottle and took a gentle sniff of all the exquisite smells inside. She dabbed her finger on the top of one bottle that she liked called summer breeze. The aroma seemed filled with a hint of honeysuckle dew from a honeysuckle vine.

Her mother was opening the door to the store so Samantha sat herself on the couch in the staff room reading how God so loved world that he gave his only son. (Matthew 3:16) She wondered why God loved everyone so much. “Dear Lord she prayed, Thank you for your son and all he has done and will do for us. Lord I pray that you will touch my mother in a special way, Lord, bless her day and guide her in you’re will lord. In Jesus mighty I pray AMEN”.

Samantha could feel her nose tingle and could smell a scent she couldn’t explain. A sense of peace overwhelmed her; she knew without a doubt that God had heard her, yet she had never smelt this fragrance before. “Mom, can you explain why I smelt something special today while I was praying for you? Samantha asks at the dinner table that night.
“Well, Sometimes Jesus will show his presence by a sweet fragrance of the Lord, it is an aroma no one can explain. It’s special my sweetheart, that Jesus came to you like that. Hold that smell always in your heart and never forget it.”

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Member Comments
Member Date
Jan Ackerson 11/01/05
A sweet story with a gentle message. Work on keeping your tenses consistent. With a few quick edits, this story will really shine.
dub W11/01/05
yeah, the tense shifts threw me, also make sure your dialog is separated. Lot of "stuff" going on in this. Keep working.
blessings - dub
Nina Phillips11/03/05
This was very nice, creative. I agree with the above. Liked the end explanation, and the close relationship between the charactors.
God bless ya, littlelight
Shari Armstrong 11/05/05
Some very nice things here (watch the present-skips and past-skipped tenses). Small detail -I think you meant John 3:16, not Matthew :)
Yolanda Baker11/06/05
sorry for not seeing the HUGE verse mix up! I should have noticed...
I will be sure in the future to look at my writing more closely
Sally Hanan11/06/05
Yes, a sweet story. if you can get a hold of Microsoft Word it would be a huge help with your punctuation and help your entry to be more polished.
Julianne Jones11/06/05
Some really lovely thoughts and ideas. An enjoyable story. Would be even better with some editing. God Bless.
B Brenton11/22/05
Ohhh... sweetie. What a nice mother daughter moment. You're such a wonderful woman, and this is from the heart. It's lovely! :D