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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Guard Your Heart (06/08/12)

TITLE: We of Little Trust
By lynn gipson


Proverbs 22:19 -- “So that your trust may be in the Lord, I teach you today, even you.”

Trust. This is a word some of us didn’t learn the meaning of while growing up. If any of the “some of us” is reading this, you will understand. Others may not.

Love was given and taken away. Violence was often followed by acts of kindness. Promises were made, then broken. Lies were told.. As children we also learned to lie. To ourselves and others. We learned to tell the grown ups what they wanted to hear.

When we were asked on those seldom occasions how we were doing, we answered with a lie. “I’m just fine.” We weren’t fine. We were falling apart inside. Our home life was chaos, and we were struggling to make sense of it all. We shook when we went to bed at night, and woke up with a feeling of dread. We became survivors in a world full of distrust.

As adults this distrust became a coping mechanism in order to keep from being hurt. Whenever someone proclaimed to love us, we pushed them away. Love was a precious commodity we just couldn’t afford. So we walked through this world alone, shutting out all possibilities of a real relationship with anyone.

Telling ourselves we were just fine, we learned to live in denial. We didn’t need anything or anyone, or so we thought. Faith was sorely missing. Maybe there was a God, but surely He didn’t really love us, did he?

Inside, though, we wanted love so badly we silently prayed for it. Then someone would come along and say those three words and we would panic and do something to make them not love us, confirming our suspicions all along. We weren’t lovable.

We didn’t know Jesus. His name was never spoken when we were growing up, except maybe at times in blasphemy. Maybe we were sent to vacation Bible school a time or two, and we learned a little about Him. We were told He loved us. He was this Savior to all who came to Him and asked for forgiveness. It didn’t matter what our sins were because He died on the cross for them before we were ever born.

So maybe then came a time in our lives when we learned depending on ourselves was not enough. We needed help. Human beings had always failed us. So who could we turn to?

I turned to Jesus. I remembered a day in vacation Bible school when I was five years old. The teacher showed me a picture of a heart with Jesus in it. She said it was my heart. That day came to me from out of the blue one night when my whole world seemed to be coming to an end.

So I began to pray to this Man in my heart. I asked Him to forgive me and He did. I asked Him to save me and He did. I asked Him to love me, and He did. Then a miracle happened inside of me. I began to feel trust.

Today I love and trust Jesus with all my being because He lives in me. I am learning more and more to have faith in other people as well. I have also learned to love others the way I want to be loved, and to forgive others the way I want to be forgiven.

Jesus has also sent people into my life I am able to put some faith into. I know these people when I meet them because I get a feeling of love and warmth from them, as if He is speaking through them. These are people who love me just as I am, with experiences much like my own.

When others disappoint me now, I realize they are only human. If you put all your faith in another human being they will often let you down. When you put all your faith in Jesus, He will never let you down. Hallelujah.

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This article has been read 548 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Deborah Engle 06/17/12
This is so true. A heart void of God is too easily wounded, but when God resides there, the heart has defenses nothing else can provide.
Verna Cole Mitchell 06/17/12
Learning to trust God, if man has been untrustworthy is a difficult thing, but our hearts are safe, indeed, in Him. You've explained it well.
Genia Gilbert06/18/12
I enjoyed this entry. It shows honesty, hurt, and yet great victory at the end. It is so good to learn to trust some people, even knowing they will sometimes fail, like us; better still to know that Jesus never fails!
Laura Manley06/18/12
I so enjoyed your entry this week. It had two elements; those days when trust did not come easily to you when you had to guard your heart, and then a time of accepting Jesus and going through a process of acceptance of others and learning that God will guard your heart. I really like how you went from one to the other. You've written a little about your background in the past and this continues to show your love of Jesus and how you depend on Him on a daily basis. Very nicely done!
Allison Egley 06/18/12
Oh, I loved this. Very nice job. I especially loved the second part, and smiled when the MC found Jesus. :)
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 06/19/12
This is such a powerful piece. I have no doubt God was right over your shoulder as you were writing this telling you "I believe in you and know you can do this."

The biggest suggestion I would give you is probably going to be one of the harder ones for you to take, but like Jesus, I, too believe in you. In the beginning you start off by telling the reader that we all may not understand the story. However just by changing it a tiny bit not only will every reader be able to understand it but will connect with the MC immediately. That's done by changing the we to I.

Later on when you did that my connection immediately grew and I felt in sync with you. I know it's not always easy to speak such truths to virtual strangers but God has people in mind for this story. By telling it from your POV it makes it easier for every reader to connect and for most to have empathy. Also in doing that you could expand a bit more by showing the reader what it is like to be in the skin of the MC. Fort example: At night, I'd crawl in bed, my knees trembled and banged together. Positive that the knocking echoed off the walls, I'd clamp my arms around them and pull my legs up to my chest in an attempt to quiet them.
That's just an example to help you understand what I mean by showing the reader. I instantly picture a little one huddled in bed, terrified.

You did a great job on this piece. It's not an easy subject to write about. I wanted to write about a sensitive story this week but ran out of courage. I have no doubt that your words will have an impact on someone in ways we can't even begin to imagine. Your Bible verse is a perfect fit. The last two words really touched my heart. "Even you" wow such an impact that even though I can't always tolerate myself God speaks directly to me, even me. Your story and the verse complement each other and give hope where hope has often been a four letter word in my heart but today your words helped changer that for me. Thank you for your obedience in God and for writing about something that couldn't have been easy. You done good! :)
Loren T. Lowery06/19/12
Amen! Proverbs 3:5-6 has been a mantra of mine for more years than I can recount! Great job in writing this article and expressing your thoughts/beliefs and emotions.
C D Swanson 06/20/12
Thank you for this powerful piece with so many levels and components. The message and your heart was clearly apparent in this entry.

Good job and God Bless you~
PamFord Davis 06/21/12
This so vividly describes the issue of trust. Thanks for sharing, in a way that your readers can understand, and apply to their lives.

Wing His Words!