The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
This is a great story. You pulled me in quickly and grabbed my interest all the way through.

There are a few spots that need polishing with the punctuation and typos. I really liked the ending of all the residents gathering around. The one statement from the man saying you don't need to worry about us M'am seemed a little forced almost as if it were from a cowboy movie.
;)Just tweaking that a tiny bit and you have an outstanding story that is so on topic. It's also filled with many messages, depending where the reader is coming from. You did a spectacular job on this one.
05/11/12
Wonderful story, well written and on topic. Gives us hope that people will care. Good job!
05/12/12
This story brings an infinite amount of hope and appeal to the reader, as it addresses the issues of abuse. It was well written, on topic...and brought the topic to a powerful close with the community standing up for what is right.

Excellent story. I loved it.

Thank you.

God Bless,

Camille~
Congratulations for ranking 6th in level 1!