The Official Writing Challenge
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This is a masterpiece. You did an outstanding job building on the conflict and creating suspense. Your descriptions made me feel like I was right there and I could feel my heart beat faster.

The only thing I might even consider was the last paragraph. I think the ending would have been even stronger if you had left it with the husband's line. I'm not sure why I feel that way, perhaps the wife's last line didn't feel as real to me or perhaps it felt like you were repeating yourself rather than let the reader figure out the lesson for herself.

But even with that uncertain opinion of the end, I still think the conclusion was strong and answered all of my questions. I also want to give you kudos for going a tad outside of the box and not use the Ecclesiastes verse that so many others used. You really did a great job developing the characters and making me want to read more of your work. I think this may be the best story I've read thus far on this topic.
04/22/12
Round of applause!
Drama! Suspense! Climax!
I love happy endings and rejoice that the ending was in reality a new beginning!

Wing His Words,
Pam
Another thing that made this story great is the messages. You have the obvious one about marriage takes a lot of work but also the one that having Christ be the center of our focus doesn't mean we don't stumble but Jesus is there to pick us up. I believe I could read this at several different points in my life and would get a different message from it each time. That takes great talent.
04/22/12
In a word, brilliant.
Your descriptions of the storm were superb, and I thought your actual storm and the storm of the marriage made for a good comparison.
04/22/12
Nice job with this. You took a common interpretation of the topic, but went at it from a unique angle.

As someone else pointed out, I don't think you needed the last paragraph. Your story illustrated it well enough.

Great job.
04/22/12
With few words, you've said much - A short, short story that begins well, and holds you captive to the end.

If only all marriages could make it through the "storm" as this one did.

04/22/12
Absolutely brilliant! You spoke to the topic perfectly!

With this kind of writing, you won't stay in the Beginners level very long!

Keep up the good work!
04/23/12
Love it! Great job with using a literal storm to teach the couple what they needed to clear the storm in their marriage.

I agree with Donna - you won't be in Beginner's for long!
04/24/12
A very descriptive and on-target entry. I enjoyed it thoroughly. Sometimes it takes what happened to this couple to wake them up to the realization that God is the only One who can hold a marriage together. Very nicely done!
04/26/12
Congrats! God Bless~
04/26/12
Congratulations Melinda! Love this deeply moving piece. Your descriptions are so intense, I could feel the tornado churning the earth, and then, the pressure lifting and the hand of God fell upon the couple.

Well done!
04/26/12
Congratulations! Well deserved win!
Congratulations for your 2nd place ribbon and for ranking 15th overall!