The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/12/12
Good commentary! Lots to think about; good questions. In the beginning of this entry, you said something about a "brake" from work, etc. I think you meant "break." I like that you make the reader think.
This is a thought-provoking sermonette. The questions you ask are all legitimate and ones many of us need to be asking.

You had a small typo -- brake instead of break. You may also want to divide a short piece like this into smaller paragraphs and double space between them to give the reader white space.

This is a good piece that truly encompasses the topic and makes the reader look inward. Nice job.
04/13/12
Wow! Such a short entry and yet packed with powerful messages and great lines.

I loved this: "We get on our knees ready to shred open our presents but do we get on our knees to pray?"

Beautifully done. I was told as a writer it is easier to write long stories...the short stories with meaning and messages is more difficult, and the sign of a great writer.

Congratulations. You did a great job.

God Bless~