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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Holiday (04/05/12)

TITLE: Back To Bethlehem
By
04/09/12


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The malls are crowded,the streets busy and full
Decorations and lights hang on every building,lightpost and wall
Oh Lord,this is not what it's about!
Help us to go back to Bethlehem,to where it all began
People everywhere celebrate Christmas;search for meaning and hope
Many talk about holiday overload,trying any means to cope
Lord Jesus,help us go back to Bethlehem
To the child King in the straw
People crowd into the stores,seeking the perfect gift
They search for something meaningful and true
If only they'd remember Bethlehem
How it all began and how it leads to You
Not just the baby in the manger
Not just a nativity scene or a holiday play
But a real Man,Jesus Christ,Son of God,Son of Man
Who left the cradle,followed God's path that day
Obeyed God's plan,laid before the foundation of the world
To rescue us from eternal darkness and sin
Preparing a place for us,the bridge to eternal life
So when we awake Christmas morning,see the gifts beneath the tree
Ask the Lord to take you back to Bethlehem
Remembering His greatest gift;His sacrifice for you and me


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This article has been read 156 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Genia Gilbert04/14/12
Point well taken. Christmas definitely needs more of the real meaning as people celebrate. Your poem seems crowded to me. It might be easier to read in verses and with more punctuation. Yet your message is good.
Camille (C D) Swanson 04/14/12
I loved this short, yet powerful message of Jesus Christ's birth. It flowed beautifully and made my heart smile. Thank you.

I can easily see this in a Christmas issue of an online magazine.

Thanks for loving God.

God Bless~
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 04/14/12
This is a perfect piece. You reach right in and grab me with your words. You made some wonderful points.

The only thing I might suggest is to perhaps break it into verses and double space between them. The white space is so important so the reader doesn't feel overwhelmed. (especially on the internet) I also noticed you missed some spacing between words. That can be caught if you hit the preview button and proof it several times before submitting.

All in all, I think you did a wonderful job. You touched my heart and your message was clear and concise without being preachy. I look forward to reading more of your work.
Nancy Bucca04/19/12
I love the message in this. Absolutely to the point and wonderful. I hope it gets some acknowledgement.