The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Wow! Beautifully written!
03/08/12
What a predicament Devon was in! Your flashbacks were intriguing, yet a little distracting. Your ending has me speechless because of course, we know what happened and I am almost grieving for Devon at this moment. So many missionaries from our church have gone through some extreme trials as of late and this reminds me of what they do for us; they are our arms, legs and our voices. Excellent story!
03/09/12
Oh my gosh! This was so powerful What an amazing story and an amazing MC.

Loved the flashbacks to the "happier days" of his life. Wow. Great job with this. Excellent. Thank you.

God Bless~
You did a nice job painting a picture with your words. I admit I had a hard time following the story. I think that maybe Devon was dying in the jungle and was flashing back over his life. Perhaps my brain is just not processing. Make sure when someone new is speaking that you start a new paragraph each time even if it's one word. I liked your message. It's a wonderful story of things missionaries go through. There are things happening that I can't even begin to imagine.
Congratulations for placing 6th in level 1!