The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Good showing instead of telling. Well written. Perhaps some grammar short cuts, a missing pronoun or two? Loved the surprise ending. Encouraging.
03/02/12
The title really fits your article well. You have done a super job in describing each scene for your readers. I loved the article and wondered just how many times we take the important people in our lives for granted when they are so wanting to know that their life matters. Thanks for the well-done reminder.
03/04/12
Truly you did a superb job of showing rather than telling. Love the surprise at the end. What an encouragement!
I enjoyed this. You did a great job of showing instead of telling. The fact that the MC was a preacher and not a businessman took me by surprise. Nicely played.
I'm notoriously bad at reading titles before stories but I wonder if I had read YOURS IF IT MIGHT HAVE GIVEN THE ENDING AWAY FOR ME. be CAREFUL WITH TELLING TOO MUCH IN THE TITLE. i STILL REALLY THINK YOU DID A GREAT JOB WITH THE TOPIC. (sorry didn't mean to lock caps, not shouting just lazy :))
YAY! Congratulations Pam. Happy Dance! Can't wait to see you in level 2 next week.
03/08/12
Congratulations! God Bless~
03/08/12
Oh Pam! I am so excited for you that I can't sit still! Plus, you made the E.C. list... oh happy day or as you recently sent me, "Oh, for goodness sake!"
03/08/12
This was very well-written and as I read it, I asked myself "why is this person writing in the Beginners?" You were very descriptive, showing and keeping this reader well entertained! If I had any criticism of this entry, it would be that the ending seemed rushed and it could be that the word limit caused this. I also LOVED the title; very appripo!
03/08/12
Congratulations on your placing Fiona. A very well written piece and I also wondered what you were doing in beginners. However you're not now are you! Well done!
03/08/12
Sorry Pam. Forgive me for calling you Fiona. I've had a busy day! Haha!
03/08/12
Sorry Pam. Forgive me for calling you Fiona. I've had a busy day! Haha!
04/23/12
Very encouraging to me today. Thanks for writing that
04/29/12
I can see why you came in first. You definietly have a way with words. I love the use of your adjectives---very descriptive. Keep on writing!