The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
02/02/12
This was a powerful story that solidifies how Jesus can change everything! Amen.

Beautifully story, and I am so warmed to hear that the MC has turned his life around, and has given it to Jesus.

Wonderful job - Thanks for sharing. God bless you~
02/03/12
This is heart-warming indeed. I took a while to get into the jargon, but it really did lend itself to the story. I liked the illustrations the worker used to describe life with Jesus, and I am thrilled that the MC accepted him! Well done.
02/04/12
I love this article. I felt like I was hearing it straight from the MC; you really captured his speech pattern well with your words. The ending is powerful and, certainly, one I was hoping to read. Very nice job.
This is a powerful story. You left me teary-eyed and with goosebumps. The beginning was excellent, it grabbed me immediately.

You had a few minor things with spacing. Make sure you capitalize Mom when using it as a name (or without a qualifier like my, the etc. in front of it.) You did have several words I wasn't familiar with like bru which I thought was likely brother. I also didn't know what jol or likker meant. I realize these could be British slang that people from England or Australia might understand immediately. But I did want you to be aware that not everyone may understand them.

Your ending was spectacular! I really like the analogy of scuba diving and God. It is an excellent message and will touch many hearts. I liked the creative way you touched on the topic. It is wonderful that there are social workers and other public servants that get out on the streets and help save the next generation.
02/07/12
Such a wonderful story-reminds me of my years working for Teen Challenge-seeing lives transformed by Jesus. God bless!
02/10/12
Congrats on your placement! God Bless~