The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
12/15/11
This was some story! I got chills towards the end with the "witness" saying "I died for him." Good job - I really liked it. It held my attention thru out.
God bless~
I really liked where you were going with this. I think it is quite a nice take on the topic. It was a tad hard to follow though. I think if you had formatted it more like a screen play with the characters and setting more defined or of you had told it more like a story it would have been clearer. It felt like you were somewhere between the two. The ending was great and you have a very powerful message. You gave me chills at times. Nicely done.
12/22/11
I, too, loved where you were going with this one! With a bit of restructuring it this would be an amazing piece of writing - not that is isn't already! The concept is fantastic. It might be a little weak on the topic, too; I didn't really see much reference to social media as such. You have a very creative mind and a wonderful insight into the spiritual side of humanity! Well done!