The Official Writing Challenge
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This is a wonderful, suspense filled story. You did an outstanding job of being creative.

The beginning was really good. It grabbed me immediately and I was eager to keep reading.

I usually don't read titles, so I missed yours. It does give away the suspense you so cleverly created. When you did mention the game I think some people might have missed that (especially if they don't read titles) You may have wanted to make just a but more demons. For example: I clicked the pause button; the game stressed me out.

I thought it was clever to hide 666 in the floor and room numbers.

You may have been the weakest on the topic. You mentioned it but the story would have been just as good without it.

I liked the ending and the message. The only thing I might change with the ending is the final sentence is a bit preachy. You delivered your message and made the reader think without asking that question. Overall you wrote a creative, inspiring story.

12/05/11
This was a wonderful story. It was so well woven together and really had me throughout. I thought the topic was done well. I tend to like it better when the topic is integrated in a more subtle and clever way - which you did.

The message is tremendous. Very nice work!
CHUCKLE! You hit the nails square on. Preach it, brother (ooops!), preach it!
A lot of suspense drew me in. I had to reread the line where you called the con man a confidence man.

Overall, good story.
12/11/11
Great job and you kept it on topic. It was well written and I enjoyed it very much. You brought forth a beautiful message without "screaming" - nice job. God Bless~