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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Search Engine (10/06/11)

TITLE: Skills Severely Lacked
By
10/16/11


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New to the computer world
My skills severely lacked,
Per my Father’s request
I went on a search
For his favorite football star
But to my demise
I did not know where to start
So did not get too far
A friend came to visit
Yelled from behind
“Try the search engine”
I said “what’s a search engine?”
She said “where you combine words
To search anything on the Internet”
Okay but why call it an engine?
I thought to my ignorant self
Then it hit me, it does the work
While I sit like a closed book on a shelf
So I typed in my Father’s search
And up popped tons of clues
To where he might be found
And all the history about him
I had to sort through millions of hits
So this is what a search engine does
Freely gives me choices of info and bits


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This article has been read 278 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Catherine Maher10/21/11
Nice little piece about the beginning stages of the internet. On topic, good start and good ending. What's next tho? Keep going next time and show what you end up finding or learning. I like your thought process.
CD (Camille) Swanson 10/22/11
Interesting and on topic. Nicely written, however I was "wanting more" - I think you had a good story, and with just a couple of more lines it would have safely concluded and "framed it" nicely. But, good job overall, I enjoyed it. God Bless~
Rachael Severa 10/23/11
I like this poem because it is very easy to recognize the events taking place. I too, thought maybe it could be a little longer, making for a more complete ending.

Try spacing your sentences/paragraphs a little for an easier read. It seemed too, that there might have been some places where commas could have been used. Although, the rules for poem writing might be different than a short story.

Keep at it. God Bless.
Linda Goergen10/24/11
Short, concise little piece that is quite descriptive of what a search engine does, from the MC’s personal view and experience. Like the others though, I felt it ended abruptly and would have benefited from a more personal ending about your search. I really liked the lines Then it hit me, it does the work While I sit like a closed book on a shelf, that was excellent and very descriptive! Enjoyed the read. Blessings.
djvenzke Venzke 10/25/11
I struggle with 'poetry' without patterns of rhyming, but I could appreciate some of the imagery. I assume a lot of the assembling of the final product is left to the imagination of the reader. Piece was on topic.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 10/26/11
You definitely covered the topic It was a creative way to but it in a poem. But it felt a little stilted. If you had used some more humor it would have fit the type of poem it was.
Beth LaBuff 11/01/11
You had some interesting comparisons that made me think (and that's a good thing). :) I read this twice to pick up every carefully chosen word and meaning.