The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
10/17/05
I think we all must endure through mistakes that we can't fix on our own. (he-he)Until next time around, thats how we learn. Very intense story Ashley, discriptive-I felt I was right there on the scene. Well written for a first. God bless ya and much love in Christ, littlelight
10/17/05
Ashly brought a tear to my eye. Sad that what was forbidden here was a society forbiddence...wow.. Truly touching
10/17/05
Yes I agree, this story is sad and true. I am glad to see we as human beings are a little better toward others with differant colour skin. I know it is still out there, yet until Jesus comes it won't ever be totally Gone. I too felt like I was there and could almost feel her heart beating as I took in your words. well done.
Overlooking the name thing i think this is very well written. From another firsttimer well done!
Ashely, dont worry about leaving your name on this - just remember next time! This is such a touching and affecting story: very true, even sometimes today we are not as far from such prejudice as we would like to believe. Some of the sentance structure needs to be tightned up a little, but this has a very individual voice I like very much. God bless, and keep writing!
10/19/05
Unfortunately, this was the case with so many people many years ago. If God created us all, why can't we treat each other all the same? I guess this question can only be answered by the One that holds all the knowledge of this world. A powerful story.
10/21/05
LOL..don't worry about your name being there:) It was a powerful story. So glad you decided to jump in and post! I was once told to not use so many exclamation points..(notice I still do in my critiques..:) But other than that, you did a great job!!