The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
I loved the sensitivity and caring you used in the story.
Homeless people are really afraid of others. Many have been taken advantage of or feel unworthy of any type of love.

There was one small typo; I think you meant caring not haring, but this did not detract at all from the ideas or flow of the story.

Great job.
I liked the idea that you didn't follow through with a storybook ending and ending on a sad but very realistic point. Well done.

Please read over you story carefully before submission. There were quite a few sentences that the sentence stucture wording was out of order or had too many words.
good story and illustrates well can only invite and care and love we cannot drag anyone into the kingdom of heaven. I think it is sad that by refusing the gospel of eternity this person also refused the bed for the night as well. I cant help thinking if the MC had taken her task one little step at a time and gained the old mans trust at first the outcome might have been different but lets hope there is another chapter to this story :-) I liked it very much
You did a nice job showing how often people dose the door to heaven without realizing it and that's much more important to show people than to have a happy ending.