Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Season(s) of a year or life (01/13/11)
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TITLE: A Season For Everything | Previous Challenge Entry
By Cedrecia Pena
01/19/11 -
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Winter seemed to have started especially early this year with a freak mid-October snow storm. As a child growing up in the northeastern part of Iowa, trick-or-treating in snow was not uncommon. In years past, however, the weather trends changed. The cold and snow have been starting later in the year and lasting longer into the Spring months. This year’s long, bitterly cold winter was stretching into March. It seemed to be holding back the much needed relief of Spring warmth and the reminder of new life that Spring always brings.
On the morning of Friday, November 3rd, as I was making breakfast, my son, Daniel, walked into the kitchen. The look on his face frightened me. Before I could ask what was wrong, he dropped to his knees, head in his hands, and sobbed uncontrollably. I was alarmed by this overwhelming emotion from my son. He was not the type of kid to so freely show his feelings. Something had to be terribly wrong.
Once he was able to put his grief into words, he told me of the phone call that he had just received…the news that his best friend had taken his own life. Daniel and Jake had been friends since first grade. They had played on the same baseball and soccer teams, helped each other through tough classes and even double dated. For years they had been inseparable. Now in their senior year of high school, without warning or evident cause, Jake was gone.
The days that followed were excruciating. Daniel went through a range of emotions from sorrow to anger, fear, guilt and resentment. He couldn’t understand how his friend could do such a thing. Why hadn’t Jake talked to him? Why hadn’t he considered how this would hurt his family and friends? Even worse, though, was Daniel’s nagging feeling of why he hadn’t seen this coming. How could it be that his best friend felt such strong feelings of hopelessness and despair and Daniel hadn’t noticed? Had Jake tried to talk to him? The guilt was overwhelming to him. The loss was immeasurable. It was as if part of Daniel had died with Jake on that November morning.
The winter weather was exceptionally harsh. The days seemed shorter than normal. The frigid temperatures, record breaking snowfall and lack of sunshine took its toll on all of us. As the cold winter dragged on, Daniel’s attitude toward his own life began to concern me. He had little to say to me or to his friends. His usual good grades and outgoing personality were being lost to a sad or, on occasion, angry attitude.
Daniel’s despair was becoming so obvious that I began to worry about his safety. I wondered if he might follow his best friend’s example in order to stop his own pain. His guilt over not being able to prevent, or even predict, Jake’s death was dragging him into his own deep despair. He was questioning everything he knew about love, friendship, honesty and hope. He was losing his own will to live.
In March, the temperatures were still well below freezing and it seemed that winter might never end. Daniel, still wrestling with a tremendous sense of sorrow, received a visit from Jake’s older brother, John. John expressed his gratitude to Daniel for being the friend that he had always been to Jake. John had no answers or explanations to offer for why Jake had taken his life. It was as much a mystery to him as it had been to Daniel. John had only a few words of encouragement to share from the Bible. These were the words that had helped him manage his own pain.
To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven:
…A time to weep,
And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
And a time to dance;
Ecclesiastes 3:1,4
Time passed; the snow melted; and life began to come up from the place where it had been hiding for the long winter. Daniel’s heart still ached for his friend. Questions and grief still plagued him, but he was also emerging from the hopelessness that had been his constant companion for such a long time. He realized that he was not responsible for his friend’s actions. For him there was a time to weep but there would be a time to laugh again. To everything there is a season.
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I think your story would have an even greater impact if you moved the first paragraph down into the body and started the story with your son walking in the room. Also remember to double-space between paragraphs to give the reader the much needed white space.
All in all, a great job and message on a very difficult topic.
It tugged the heartstrings without being over sensational or contrived.