The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
12/03/10
very interesting and descriptive thanks ...... i want to know what happens next!
12/05/10
Would like to have heard a little more. It would be an easier read if there were some divisions in the writing. Good job of describing body language.
12/05/10
Lots of descriptive writing here. I like this.." An internalization of feelings and a suppression of words join hands and stir an evil concoction, the devils playground."...and others. You can feel the strain of restraint. I was thrown off somewhat at the beginning when you began your subject with "Ears" and went on to use the pronoun,"he." Perhaps, this is something you might want to look at.
12/06/10
Wow, what a description of body language! The only thing that seems to be missing is a clear setting. (Unless it was left out on purpose) It has me wanting to know more.
12/08/10
An amazing description of an internal warfare. I like your wording. I could feel the tension build as the piece went on. Thanks for sharing.