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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Gossip/Rumors (either or both) (10/28/10)

TITLE: Friendship Interrupted
By Bola M. Eyinla
10/30/10


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Dear Kayla,

Why do the nations assemble with commotion, and why do the people imagine an empty scheme? (Psalm 2:1). And why did our friendship have to come to such an abrupt end?

I hope that this letter would clarify some of the issues and misunderstandings between us.

Oh! How I have longed to express my feelings about what led to my decision to end our friendship. I prayed that God would enlighten and give me the courage to tell you without hurting your feelings or sounding self righteous. Now I owe it to you and myself to “let the cat out of the bag” or “spill the beans.” You know? All those expressions you use.

I miss you and wish we were still as close as we used to be. Anyway, I want to let you know that it makes me very uncomfortable that all you seem to do lately is relay unpleasant information about friends and family to others. It seems to me that gossiping has become a habit of yours.

Previously, you told me about your neighbor who was beaten and almost strangled to death by her husband. And when I asked you to join me in prayer for her situation, you laughed and brushed me off. Your excuse was that you did not want to get involved. Your reaction left me with the impression that you were delighted about what your neighbor was going through. And I was stunned!

In another instance, you phoned me about your coworker. You told me that she had been bleaching and coloring her six and eight year old daughters’ hair because she wants them to resemble a certain nationality. I brushed you off and stopped the conversation by telling you that your coworker can do whatever she wants. After Which, you seemed a bit offended at my reaction.

Gossiping is a big deal as far as I am concerned, because these two people are church members and close friends of ours. The gossips make me very uncomfortable and I despise this kind of conversation.

I was also very shocked when you told me about your sister’s husband’s drug issues. You seemed to delight in the fact that their marriage was on the rocks. Somehow, I feel like you will eventually talk about me to others. And this makes me very sad, scared and uncomfortable. I find it very difficult to trust you, Kayla!

There are scriptures in the Bible against gossiping and I have tried in the past, to share them with you. Here again are the scriptures that I am referring to; a gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much (Proverbs 20:19), also a perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends (Proverbs 16:28).

I wish you would stop spreading unpleasant and personal information about others. It makes me feel so guarded around you, and have had to be cautious about sharing certain information with you. I am not at all amused or impressed by your gossiping habits, Kayla.

I miss our friendship; I mean the friendship that led me to Christ. And I can not help but wonder what happened to you? When did you start deriving pleasure from the pain of others and why are you no longer interested or moved to pray for them?

“Father, forgive me for judging Kayla”.

In my opinion, we should abide by the scripture, which teaches us to bear the burdens of others. We should support and intercede for others in prayer. Our conversations should edify others and not tear them down. I pray that you will start to recognize when you are saying something negative about somebody else and learn to repent (Amen).

I also want you to know that during my conversations with God, I ask Him to forgive and heal you. I pray that He would speak love and peace into your heart. May God’s light and love shine through you again (Amen).

Kayla, not knowing how you are doing personally bemuses me, because recently, you have not answered this question “how are you doing?” I sincerely would love to know the answer to that question, my dear friend!

God Bless,
Bola.


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This article has been read 322 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Verna Mull11/04/10
A great job of communicating the horrible results of gossip.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 11/04/10
You make some really good points in the letter. However it did feel a bit judgemental rather than 100% loving which I can see may have been a way to emphasis your point. We are to approach others with the love Jesus shows us. This is a great message. Be careful about using your real name in the letter if you did. All in all a great job. Keep writing.
Philip Barrington11/04/10
Keep writing. I found it a bit hard to read. But that could be just me. Different writers love different things to read. I agree to keeping real names out, that is if you did. But all in all a good job.
Jan Ackerson 11/06/10
If I were struggling with a friend, this is the type of letter that I'd like to think I'd write.
Bola M. Eyinla11/08/10
Thanks for all your wonderful comments. I thank God for guiding me to this website and I am grateful for all the new knowledge I have acquired so far. I look forward to learning more and improving my writing skills. I just want to let everybody know that my letter was fictional. This things happen in real life experiences and l was not trying to judge anybody. I was just writing to the topic. I do not have a friend named Kayla.
Cheryl Harrison 11/08/10
It may be fictional, but it is heart-felt. Confronting someone you love about the sin of gossip is difficult at best. Blessings to you.