The Official Writing Challenge
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This had almost every emotion in me, bubbling over! I was completely enthralled!! What a POWERFUL testimony about talking in front of those with brain injuries. I have always believed and treated patient's as if they could hear and told them that I know how frustrated they must feel not being able to respond but to have faith that God would bring it to pass. I think this was very well written and see you moving up the ranks, REAL fast! There are so many really good beginners and you are one of them! Good Job and if this is a true account...I Praise and Thank God for your recovery!!!
07/17/10
Your words toward the end: "body you will move, eyes you will see, ears you will hear," brought my mind to several places in the Bible where God addresses such things on earth and in heaven. Captivating account.
07/17/10
Excellent! If this is a real account thank God some doctor didn't presume to play God and give an early death sentence. Well told! May God keep blessing you, Ruth
Interesting approach to the topic, a testimony that teaches and encourages. A few edits are needed, easy to miss when checking your own work. Maybe allowing enough time to re-read several times would help. Keep writing and entering the Challenge!
You had me attached to the story. My wife was in an induced coma for pnuemonia. One day in her deep sleep she was trying to get out of bed. Just for a little joke I said to her. What are you doing hon? trying to get out of bed? She nodded her head clearly up and down as she acknowleged what I said.

Thank you and God bless.
07/22/10
Patsy, congrats on being highly commended for this piece. Very interesting. Long ago my three year old niece was in a coma for a month. Her mother read to her daily and all the visitors were encouragaed to talk to her. I the frustration of your MC and am so glad this had a happy ending. Keep writing.
This is filled with such wonderful emotion and most of all hope. The voice seemed to be close to what a 14 yo would say. If you could show things instead of tell them, it will bring your reader right into the story with you. At first it sounds hard, but once you get the hang of it, you'll find it is fun to write that way. It is a great job.