The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
You're right. Thank God for His saving grace through mercy and not our works! This story was so eye opening to the challenges of finding work in such a sinking economy. You did a great job showing the temptations of this world that go along with "surviving". I was so relieved to see the last man at the unemployment office step forward to actually help AND utilize the help of the Veterans administration. I continually thank God for our Vets who deserve so much more than they have ever received in return for their service! You also did a good job in reminding us what happens when we neglect staying in the word and surrounded by other believers.

Be sure to double space between paragraphs for easier reading ;)
07/17/10
Sadly, your story is repeated over and over today. You told the story well. May God bless you. Ruth
You evoked empathy for the MC and drew the reader in. Paragraph spacing is important. You may have spaced before copying and pasting it here, but that won't carry over. You need to double space between paragraphs before copying for it to give the desired effect. Before hitting the submit button, look to the left and hit the preview button first. Then you'll see if it's right. Keep writing and submitting to the Challenge!