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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: The Manuscript (04/29/10)

TITLE: God's Manuscript
By Charlotte Maccallum
05/03/10


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God’s Manuscript

“More straw, more water. Uncle Moses I thought you were freeing us from slavery?’ Seven-year-old Ruth becomes very concerned when seeing her uncle preparing for what seems to her to be hard manual labour.

“No poppet I’m preparing for a meeting I have with God. On Tuesday Uncle Aaron and I are going away for sometime, I hope that things are better round here when I return.” Moses kindly replies.

“What meeting, why?” twelve year old Joshua comes running up to hear what his sister is so concerned about.

“Now you two should be playing outside. I am going to spend sometime alone with God; He has something very important that He wants me to record. When I’m done I have a good feeling that life will be a lot better around here when I come home. ”

“Oh”, said Joshua in amazement, “So you’re making tablets to write down what God’s manuscript?”

“Yes Josh one cleaver boy, I’m going to speak with God on behalf of the nation, He is going to teach me His law.”

“But Uncle Moses, I thought God loves us?” Joshua questions. “Why is He going to tell us what to do?

“God dose love us, Joshua. That’s why He is giving us the law so we know how to love in a way that will make Him pleased."

“Wow, God really must love us if He wants to teach us how to love.” Joshua now has a better understanding of God then most boys twice his age.

“That’s right”, Miriam walks up behind her children, “You two run along and give your uncle some space. He is a very busy man.”

“Ok, we’ll see you later. Good luck Uncle Moses.” Josh says before running outside.

“After all you’ve done for us; the people still think you’ve loss your mind. I just heard couple of guys having a great time poking fingers at your leadership.” Miriam says once the children have left.

“Hey! I know everyone thinks I’m mad but they don’t know God like I do. God is calling me up there, I just know He is.” Moses replies trying to lighten the mood.

“Your one faithful man, Moses and I am proud to call you my brother. But just what exactly are you and God planning to do up in the clouds?”

“Well I’m not quite sure. The Lord is a God of few words. He never gives too much detail. He just told me to bring two stone tablets and a bunch of sticks. And He did say something about laws. I’m guessing He wants me to write down some kind of manuscript. I suppose if God had told me that we’d all be wondering through a desert for a few years. I probably would have stayed in Midian.”

“Maybe that wouldn’t have been such a bad idea. If you haven’t noticed we’re kinda lost in the dessert.”

“We’ve not lost Miriam; we’ve following God’s fire and His cloud. And look at the manna and the quail. If we were lost how would we receive God’s prevision?” Moses’ faith doses not waver like his sister’s doses.

“I know you’re right Moses and some mornings I wake up full of joy, thanking God that I have been taken out of Egypt. I could not be more ready to cook or march forward or do what ever God has planed for the day. But other days I just have to ask myself are we really following God or has my dear little brother lost his mind and is now taking this nation on a wild goose chase through the desert.”

“I know what you mean, and sometimes I struggle too. I mean I’m going to have a privet meeting with God up on the mountain. Who dose that? ”

“Who’s staff turns into a snake then back into wood, turn water to blood, parts the sea and brings water from a rock?” Miriam’s faith is suddenly rekindled.

“You’ve got a point there. We’ve certainly seen more then our fair share of miracles. But you’ve done more work then should be done in three life times.”

As always Moses and Miriam had put their heads together and have gained a better understanding of the God that they are following.


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This article has been read 358 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Jan Ackerson 05/07/10
This is a clever approach to the topic word.

There were some errors in writing mechanics, and praticularly in tense--consider using past tense in a narrative such as this one.

I liked the little glimpse into Moses' family.
AnneRene' Capp 05/07/10
Enjoyed your twist of modern day vocabulary along with personalizing Moses and his family. Moses is perhaps my favorite biblical character so was very drawn into this.
stanley Bednarz 05/07/10
Great story idea. Felt original and kept my interest. Dialogue: be sure not to make the character's turn into talking puppets giving loads of information. Use dialogue mainly to flesh a characters attitudes,nuances, etc..
Keep writng. There is no better family that cares!
Mildred Sheldon05/08/10
I loved your approach to the challenge. This held my interest and I love how you showed Moses through the eyes of his family. Thank you and God bless.
Joanna Stricker05/08/10
I enjoyed perspective you gave this story in the way you made the family life--so normal. It made it easier to relate. One thing, you may want to check your 'doses" as opposed to 'does'. 'Dose' has a meaning such as, to 'dose' someone with medicine or give them a dose of cough syrup. 'Does' which is what was intended, has a meaning 'to do' something. I think my favorite part was the conversation between Miriam and Moses--they sound so typical of a brother-sister conversation. Changed my perspective :-). Good job.
Beth LaBuff 05/11/10
"God's Manuscript" written with His hand. (what a thought!) I enjoyed your story of Moses' family. You've brought them to life here.