The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/30/10
Interesting setting and characters! I would like to have seen a little more. Well done!
This is powerful, scary but reassuring at the same time. The setting was original. I'd have enjoyed knowing more.

In the last paragraph you don't need to put new quotes around each part between the... You just need them at the beginning and the end.

You did a great job with a topic that must have been difficult to picture your MC being left behind. Thank you for the courage and wisdom your characters had.
Wow. What an interesting and difficult setting for a short story. Yes, it might have been nice to see more into your character's lives, but I really liked what you did show us. Nice job.
05/03/10
I love the way your beginning seemed part of our current experience and then you twisted it into something much more interesting.

I saw a few typos, but a little more proof reading will catch those.

You also did a good job of resolving things for the MC at the end.
05/03/10
I've read lots of post-rapture stories, but this one is unique.

There were several spelling errors and other little oopses that need to be tidied up to give this piece the impact it should have...and I'm having a hard time finding this week's topic here.

LOVE that your main character is in a wheelchair--how creative!
Congratulations in placing in the top 10 in your level.