Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  



The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: White (10/29/09)

TITLE: If only...
By Alicia Calhoun
11/04/09


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

There is a white tulip
drooping,
wilting.
It tries so hard to hang on,
but itís no use.
No matter how hard it tries,
it cannot survive alone.
It realizes this,
and tries to call for help
from the sky above.
Maybe the sky will help.
Sky always offers.
Tulip asks, it
cries,
pleads.

But the sky is too busy,
looking out
amongst all the beautiful flowers.
They are so healthy
sky thinks to itself.
It is proud because
it knows, that it is responsible
for the flowers prospering.
They are
so happy,
so healthy.

All except for the dying white tulip,
who hasnít given up,
but who knows
the end is near.
It pleads for the sky
to give it some rain.
But the sky does not hear.
Tulip is too weak,
and surrounded by so many
healthy flowers.
So bright and full of life.
They wonít help either.
They donít pay any attention
to the flower.
Ha! they tried once,
but the tulip was too proud
And now they have given up
a little too soon.

Tulip knows that it is impossible,
for the sky to see it
in the midst,
of all the beautiful flowers.
But it still does not lose hope.
Once more it
cries,
pleads,
with the sky.
This time, the sky sees
this weak, fragile, white, flower.
Sky immediately calls for rain.
It doesnít take long,
But tulipís been waiting so long.
Sky hurries,
Goes as fast as it can.
The rain travels
Down,
Down,
Down.
It reaches the flower.
The flower falls
Down,
Down,
Down,
The sky was too late.
The flower was gone forever.

If only the tulip
Had asked for help sooner.
If only the sky
Had been paying attention.
If only the other flowers,
Hadnít given up so soon.
If only the tulip
Had one more chance.
But it doesnít,
And never will.
If onlyÖ
If onlyÖ

With God there are no
If onlyís.


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 277 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Terry R A Eissfeldt 11/09/09
The fragility of my soul is here. Though things have a season, a life, and death happens, sometimes it is sooner than necessary because of pride. Lots to meditate on today.Thanks
Lenda Blackmon11/09/09
wow, pretty deep. Sounds like a soul crying out for help. great writing, keep it up.
Jan Ackerson 11/09/09
I really liked the extended metaphor here.

Since you asked for suggestions--it could be tightened up a bit; it got to be a bit long and I started skimming for the ending.

The ending, by the way, was great1
Beth LaBuff 11/10/09
I like your contrast in your poem and then the ending. I'm so glad there are no "if only's" with God.. Very nice!
Marie Fink11/11/09
Your poem was exquisite. I loved the visual with, "down, down,down," too. Then the last stanza didn't seem to fit. I thought you were going to say something about the bulbs and how there was hope for next spring. I'm sure there is some way to make the "If only's" happen still. :)
Marie Fink11/11/09
Oops. Compared to the other comments, I certainly am off track with your poem. Well, I did say most of it was exquisite. :)