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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: White (10/29/09)

TITLE: The Flash of White Light
By anne fraser
10/30/09


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Where was he? What had happened? Was this a nightmare?

Jack lay there unable to move, the pain searing through his body.

Then he remembered - the flash of white light.

He had been on patrol with Kevin looking for unexploded bombs that had been laid by the Taliban.

He looked down at this body. Where his leg should have been there was nothing but a stump of raw flesh. The wound was bleeding profusely.

Jack felt himself start to vomit. He turned his head sideways and then he saw his dismembered leg about six feet away from him.

"Oh God, Oh God, my Mum and Dad. How will they feel when they open the letter that I wrote prior to coming to Afghanistan? The letter that had to be opened in the event of my death."

They would now be childless. Jack's sister had died three years previously. She had got in with the wrong crowd and ended up addicted to heroin. She had been found dead with a syringe in her arm. Another victim of drugs.

Jack had joined the marines shortly after her death. He was glad he had been posted to Afghanistan because he felt that he was avenging her death by fighting the Taliban.

He heard shots going off all around him. Now the Taliban had ambushed the patrol.

He then heard Kevin's voice. "Jack lie still, don't move. We will get these murderous Taliban and then help you."

That was the last thing that Jack remembered until he heard Kevin's voice again. "Jack, look! look! I've got your leg.

"Can you hear me Jack? Listen the chopper is coming. The medics say that they may be able to regraft your leg."

"Jack, Jack, - do you hear me?"

Jack opened his eyes and saw Kevin's worried face.


Grabbing Kevin's arm he said, "the flash of white light...............


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This article has been read 268 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Barbara Lynn Culler11/06/09
Interesting story, yet I felt like it ended too soon. What about the flash of white light?
Laura Manley11/07/09
Very intriguing story from the beginning to the end. I'm assuming the flash of white light was that of whatever exploded around him. Your story did seem a little rushed towards the end, but we are limited to a certain number of years. Although it is hard to think of what goes on in war, I think you did an excellent job conveying this scene to us. Was this a personal event? Good job.
Mark Bell11/08/09
nicely portrayed slice of life in the ME. the confusion from being wounded was real. the fear of dying, well written. i agree with the previous comment, though. it ended without resolution and left too many questions open. but, overall, well done.
Marie Fink11/09/09
You described pain and devastation in war in a creative way, perhaps from experience, but either way, it held my interest. Keep writing.