The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
10/29/09
very real situation well portrayed. it brought tears to my eyes because i have been in a similar situation. good job revealing what a single person's obedience can do.
10/30/09
A wonderful short story of God's providence.
10/30/09
What a touching story. Very Good!
10/31/09
I need another tissue. Beautiful writing and demonstration of following God's guidance.
10/31/09
What a sad situation!

Be careful about switching tenses, and you introduced an "I" in the first paragraph who never returned.

I liked the ending very much.
10/31/09
What an outstanding story! Very imaginative. I agree with Jan re the tenses, but overall, this was spellbounding. I was with you the entire story. Keep writing! Laura
11/01/09
This is easy to read and very interesting. It had a good flow and it sounded real. Thanks for sharing and keep 'em coming.