The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
10/23/09
I think it's worth it too. I want to get a nice laptop for cheap. I will sit out in the cold for hours for it. Asking questions within a story keeps a reader focused and makes them think. I know I did. Good job!
10/27/09
It seems like people either love Black Friday or they hate it...I'm one of the latter.

A few notes: be careful of using unnecessary apostrophes in plural words, and of the overuse of exclamation points (which should be used very rarely in narrative, if at all).

I liked your voice in this piece; I felt as if I knew you and your husband. Very casual and pleasant to read.
10/27/09
Hubby is rare most men cringe and complain. Cute story.