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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Red (10/01/09)

TITLE: The Nudge
By Cindy Moore


Black is the night sky as I feel his nudge, waking me from deep slumber. I moan in defiance as I roll over on the couch. My sheet deserts me and slithers to the floor. I know he is waiting, but the child in me rebels. I pull the pillow tight over my head before I feel the nudge again.

I whine, “Now?” He doesn’t respond, but the answer is clear. Like a cat, I stretch out my weary bones, willing them to move.

At last I sit up and peer through the dark shadows. Everyone else is still asleep. Unaware that he has come.

Tiptoeing, I make my way to the wall of glass. My hands slip through the cream colored blinds, parting them like Moses at the Red Sea. I pass through undetected. The blinds close in behind me erasing any evidence of my escape.

“POP!” the lock screams as it gives in and the door cracks open. I cringe, unable to receive a life giving breath as I wait to be detected by the others. No one comes. I hear only the soft purr of deep slumber coming from within. I can breathe as the door is closed at last. I have escaped.

He is silent. Unable to look at him, I walk to the dewy rail of the balcony. A pelican flaps its weary wings. I manage to whisper, “I’m sorry.” The words, so weak, can never be enough. He knows I have abandoned him, left him to seek my own pleasures. I am ashamed.

He cracks a smile that brightens the grey sky. His deep voice tingles up my spine as he says, “Welcome, I have missed you.” The green fronds of the majestic queen palm dance on his words. His breath tastes sweet on my soured ears.

“I meant to call, but I’ve been so busy. I just couldn’t get away. I…” I have to stop myself. He know my excuses, he’s heard them all before. I drop my head into my hands, my eyes close as they sting with shame.

To my amazement his strong arms pull me near in a warm embrace. I look up see that his smile has grown, painting the morning sky. Emerald blues leap from the raging sea turning into an opalescent froth before crashing onto the golden sand. The pink and violet flowers stand erect ready to announce his arrival.

I am warmed by his gentle breath as he speaks, “I love you!” The words roll in like waves crashing down upon me. They engulf me, reverberating in my heart, pulsating into my fingers and toes.

My heart pounds as I look up into his eyes. Red and round, a burning bush, they glow with pure glory. I can only look for an instant before I am forced to shield my eyes. I feel his tender kiss on my cheek as he rises. I cannot look upon him again. His Holiness is too bright. Yet, through my closed lids I can still see him smiling at me, telling me “I love you.”

My soul is filled as the brilliant red glow covers me with the warmth of his love. My unfailing God, my Christ warming me with the red rays of the sun.

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This article has been read 470 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Shilo Goodson10/08/09
This was good, unique story. I enjoyed reading it. You ended the story really well too.
Jan Ackerson 10/10/09
Lovely writing, far above Beginner level. I'm delighted to have read this entry.
PamFord Davis 10/12/09
Nice description of intimate encounters between a believer and the lover of her soul!
Ruth Brown10/13/09
I liked this piece very much!
diana kay10/15/09
I like this lovely writing. The only bit I didnt like was the way she went through the glass window like a ghost. Loads of lovely description. a rich velvet peice Lucious!
diana kay10/15/09
and well deserved. I didnt get through all the beginners but yours definately stood out.... now you have got to join the intermediates but the good news is that there are less people in there... Welcome!
Lori Robbins10/16/09
Not sure if I can appreciate the implications but the piece is well written.
Lisa Johnson10/16/09
Very descriptive. Very passionate. You had me closing my eyes, and imagining the glory of God still visible, though my eyes were closed. Congratulations on a well deserved win.
Genuine Suede10/17/09
Congratulations on your win, Cindy. Thrilling, isn't it! :0)

I had to read your story a few times because some places were confusing for me, but that could just be me--I don't always easily understand someone else's writing. I thought it was creative and well written. Good job.