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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Sightseeing (08/08/05)

TITLE: Seeing His Sights
By Debbie Sickler


Seeing His Sights

The sun was just peaking over the horizon creating beautiful hues of orange and pink in the sky, but Stephanie was already up. She made her bed, fluffing the pillows carefully, and put on her well-worn running shoes. She finished her cup of tea, set the mug down gently on the counter and gave her high ponytail a tug to tighten it. She gave her cat, Ginger, a quick pet good-bye as she headed out the door into the brisk morning air.

She was filled with excitement as she closed her front gate behind her and headed down the sleepy street. Today she was sightseeing. No, she wasn’t going to the Statue of Liberty, the Eiffel Tower or Stonehenge. No, today she wouldn’t be celebrating the wonders of man, but acknowledging the wonders of the master architect.

She had not gone far before she heard chirping in a nearby tree. She looked closely and discovered a nest just over her head with three tiny baby birds. They were pretty scrawny, only a few downy feathers here and there. Their eyes were still closed and they were chirping madly in hopes their mother would return quickly with some juicy morsel to satisfy their appetites. After a moment of reflection, Stephanie continued on her adventure.

She felt the wind blow gently, tickling the back of her neck, and snuggled down a little deeper into her light-blue windbreaker. Across the street her neighbor’s sprinkler timer kicked in, showering the lush lawn with an arc of water creating a small rainbow. It had been a long time since she had really thought about the meaning of a rainbow and the promise behind its beauty.

She soon came to the path that led down to the lake. She reached the waters’ edge and found a soft spot in the fallen pine needles to sit. She pulled her knees into her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Closing her eyes, she said a quick prayer thanking God for the day and asked Him to show her all the beauty in His creations around her.

She whispered a quiet amen and opening her eyes, saw the sunlight filtering through the trees, casting a warm golden glow across the surface of the calm water. Out of the corner of her eye she spotted two dragonflies flittering by in a courtship dance. As she took in her surroundings, her gaze drifted to the earth beneath her feet. Leaning forward, she sat Indian style and stared down into the patch of grass.

She noticed a beetle wandering about here and there and wondered where he was headed. A couple inches from her left foot there was a line of ants going back and forth. Some of the ants were carrying crumbs of food back to the nest. Stephanie thought about the incredible strength in such a small creature and considered how much strength she had in herself. She realized that it wasn’t much and was glad that she didn’t have to rely on her own strength, but could turn to her Heavenly Father to help her through any life struggles. After all, He did create all this; it just made since to let Him be her tour guide.

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Member Comments
Member Date
Jan Ackerson 08/15/05
Nice visuals on your protagonist's morning jog. Add some variety to your piece by beginning sentences with different words (you have quite a few that begin with "She...")
Shari Armstrong 08/17/05
Good descriptions, I could see it all in my head. :)
Donnah Cole08/19/05
Very vivid. Felt like I was there. I agree -- try using different words to begin your sentences, and make sure you use the correct words, i.e. sense instead of since (at the end).
Julianne Jones08/22/05
Thank you for reminding us to take time to take in the sights God has made and that are all around us. You could try to vary the way you begin your sentences. For example, "She whispered a quiet amen and opening her eyes, saw the sunlight ..." could be easily changed to "Whispering a quite amen, she opened her eyes and saw the sunlight..." The meaning doesn't change but it just makes it more interesting for the reader when the sentences don't all start with "she". Keep on writing.