The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
08/20/09
This story is an absolute delight. It kept my interest from the title to the end of the story. Double spacing between paragraphs would make this much easier to read, but very nice done. Laura
Very nice article. Toddlers do have a way of describing things, don't they?
08/22/09
Very sweet, Love the line about shredded cotton balls! Good writing!!
How beautiful. Being so busy in life we sometimes almost miss the more important aspects of life. Through a child's eyes I can see in your story the sweetness of simplicity. Keep writing. I loved it! God speaks to us a lot of times in the little things!
08/24/09
Some very good descriptive parts to this interesting piece - yes spaced paragraphs would help - take a look at how the masters space theirs. Colin
Great descriptions and storytelling. Get the spacing right, and you won't be in this level long. Very well done!!!
08/24/09
Very enjoyable story with a message we all could hear from time to time. Very believable.
You have good writing potential. Please, keep it up.
Mona
08/24/09
I love this story, and could relate to it very well! It's so easy to follow the to-do list... but nothing is as important and meaningful as sharing a child's joy and wonder. Well done!
08/24/09
Hmmmm...this reads like a true story. I'm guessing you really have a daughter who called snowflakes "baby angels"...if not? Well..it was a delightful story anyway!
08/26/09
Lovely story - you gave me a real sence of place and the MC character was easy to relate to.